Sometimes in the middle of the night when the wind sounds like a ghost and the shadow of the rocking chair looks like a hunchbacked monster and all the worries and anxieties of the day are circling your head and screaming at you like banshees, you need warm fuzzies.
So I layed there in the dark (ok, I turned the nighlight on) and tried to think of all things memories that give me that warm, comfortable feeling inside. Those moments that you would love a chance to replay over and over again, or just experience one more time. My warm fuzzies:
The time I had the measles and my mom set up the lounge chair for me outside, so I wouldn't miss a beautiful spring day. She gave me a blanket and a pillow and a pile of books and made me lunch and served it to me. Then she sat next to me and read with me until I fell asleep in the sun.
All the times it snowed on Christmas eve, when I would stand at the front door and delight in the way the snow looked almost blue at night, the way it made everything glow and sparkle. And in my child's eye, every twinkling star could have been Santa flying through the sky.
The smell of my grandmother's house on a Sunday morning. Tomatoes and garlic and olive oil, so sweet and wonderful and strong that I could smell it as I stood on the sidewalk outside her house.
My children when they were infants, both of whom loved to fall asleep on top of me in the recliner, their little heads resting on my shoulder, their fingers curled around mine, and I'm glad I knew enough then to treasure those quiet, serene moments.
The first time I kissed Justin, on the Amtrak platform in Penn Station.
The second time I kissed Justin, outside of Penn Station, the noise and bustle of New York City all around us. We were oblivious to everyone and everything except for the man who stopped us mid-kiss and asked if we had just gotten married because we were behaving like newlyweds.
Every "I love you" that was every spoken to me or by me with sincere honesty.
Summer storms when the sky gets suddenly dark and the wind comes out of nowhere and the thunder shakes the ground.
Autumn days where the sky is that perfect blue and the leaves are a million shades of October.
Waking up and laying in bed, feeling that dread of another workday in your stomach and head, then realizing it's Saturday.
Finding a favorite movie on the tv while having a 3am insomnia bout.
Having a bedtime story whispered in your ear in the middle of the night when you are having a hard time getting back to sleep. Falling asleep in the arms of your favorite storyteller.