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handy dandy mood cycle chart

The handy dandy chart of my cycle

It has been brought to my attention that I am moody. Particularly around this time of the month. I have therefore compiled a handy chart of my mood swings and accompanying factors in order to make your visit here more enjoyable one, and so you can better understand my needs, desires and unpredictable behavior. I have covered only the actual days of my cycle and not the days that are PreMS or PostMs . That's a course that can never be charted.

Day -1
Emotional symptoms: Lethargy, listlessness, apathy, complete and utter sadness that covers my soul with a black canvas.
Typical word usage: Whatever. I don't care. Please kill me now. Do you have any pot?
Physical symptoms: Fat. Bloated. Blotchy. Occasionally a zit appears.
Food: Salt. Chips, pretzels, salt straight from the shaker.
Soundtrack: Nine Inch Nails/Downward Spiral.


Day 2:
Emotional Symptoms: anti-social, jumping out of skin, aggressive, yet still happy
Physical Symptoms: 3 words: Bad Hair Day
Typical word usage: Get the fuck off the road if you can't drive right! I will kill you and your pets and your neighbor's pets!
Food: The flesh of your ancestors
Soundtrack: Godflesh, Front Line Assembly, Cannibal Corpse

Day-3:
Emotional symptoms: Edginess, irritability. Do not touch me. Don't even look at me.
Physical symptoms: The bloat has moved up to my breasts.
Typical word usage: You want a piece of me? Keep away from my coffee.
Food: Aything and everything. Completely ravenous. red, red meat.
Soundtrack: Slayer/God Hates Us All

Day 4:
Emotional Symptoms: Intropsective, morose, vulnerable, depressed (see, martyr)
Physical symptoms: I feel nothing. nothing.
Food: I do not need food to exist. I live off the pain and sadness that I am fed daily. (do i have this martyr thing down, or what?)
Soundtrack: Nick Cave, Stabbing Westward, Hayden

Day 5:
Emotional Symptoms: Happy Happy Joy Joy. Bouncing off the walls. Giddy, uncontrollable laughter.
Basically - completely delirious and unfit to be seen with in public.
Physical symptoms: that wild-eyed look
Typical word usuage: Let's knock over some garbage cans!
Food: breakfast: coffee. lunch: tequila. dinner: mas tequila.
Soundtrack: The Cure, Depeche Mode, Theme to SpongeBob SquarePants

So from now on I will tell you when the proper day comes around every month and you can take out your charts and tread accordingly in these parts.

Just so you know, this is currently Day 2. You've been warned.

Comments

Owwww... that's quite a ride. I'll come back on day 5 with margarita mix and expect to be amused.

You know what Michele? I just remembered I canít come over today. Ummm I have to umm crochet a cake. Iíll see ya next week OK? BYE! [runs for cover]

I do have some pot, but since it is Day 2, I guess you won't be needing any for another month. It will probably be gone by then. Sorry (he snickers, while eating a cupcake and playing GTA3).

Jesus, we're synched up. Can I refer people to this page when they wonder what's wrong with me?

My god, this is brilliant.

Hello. If you are owner of this site, delete this message, please.

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