barely breathing
barely breathing
I woke up several times last night gasping for air. At one point, I thought I was going to die. No matter what I did I couldn't suck up enough air into my lungs. I couldn't swallow. It was as if my throat was closed off. And this has nothing to do with being sick. This happens to me at least once a month, sometimes more, and I think I am having panic attacks in my sleep.
I used to suffer from panic attacks in my late teens and early 20's. I learned how to handle them and while they didn't go away completely, I had an easier time dealing with them. I haven't had one, at least while awake, in about 5 years.
I'm sure they are related to the fact that my brain seems to work on full function while I am sleeping. I've talked about my dreams before; how they are so vivid and detailed that I wake up exhausted. Every anxiety I have is manifested in my dream life. So it would make sense that if I were to have anxiety attacks again, they would come in my sleep. No?
The thing is, I am not a good sleeper anyhow. I never sleep straight through a night and I know I don't sleep enough. But last night was hell. I think I slept about 1 hour total and part of that was spent choking half to death. And then there's the fact that I don't seem to be getting much better. I've been on the antibiotics almost a week now. Shouldn't I be ok by this point? How long does pneumonia last, anyhow? Is there a doctor in the house?
So, no links today, no war or politics talk, no making fun of celebrities. Just me bitching about my health. But don't worry. I'm going to Price Club (Costo's) during lunch today. I'm sure I will get into a least one parking space duel, or at least hate enough people in the space of one hour to make a decent blog later.
Comments
You have panic attacks when you're asleep? Fighting off the monsters and the endless corridors and the sticky staircases...
Or are those just my dreams? The ones where Pinhead comes and offers me eternal pleasure and damnation mixed together in sweet agony... where did this little copper ornate cube come from?
Posted by: D | December 4, 2001 05:09 AM
Pneumonia tends to hang around quite a while for some people. I hope you get to feeling better soon, dear, and get some much needed sleep soon.
Posted by: Lee | December 4, 2001 07:43 AM
Ugh, that sucks, Michele, I'm sorry. If it's any consolation, the last time I had pnuemonia, I was 16 and I was actually hospitalized for 7 days, and still sick for another 7. Took me two weeks to get over it. Bah.
Posted by: Candi | December 4, 2001 08:21 AM
Eeeu ugh that's horrid.
You should check in with your doc again; that doesn't sound right at all. Not that being sick ever sounds right.
Well, hey, the Packers won! Hope you were able to enjoy that.
Posted by: Miriam | December 4, 2001 10:36 AM
you might want to look into a medical reason like sleep apnea or asthma. it sounds very alarming, and if you have good insurance, it might be worth the time to see some drs. just in case something is amiss.
Posted by: llh | December 4, 2001 11:14 AM
I did call a sleep clinic once and they did a questionaire over the phone. They deduced that I was suffering from sleep apnea. Of course, I never did anything about it. I suppose it's time.
Posted by: michele | December 4, 2001 01:18 PM
If you never did anything about it, isn't that just regular apathy?
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