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displays of tackiness

displays of tackiness

I think everyone in my neighborhood yesterday decided to forego shopping in favor of hanging Christmas lights. It was a beautiful day, near spring-like weather, and the ladders were out in full force yesterday as I walked down the block. I like Christmas decorations. Well, some of them. I like lights. Lights make a house look pretty. What I don't like is when people take Christmas as an opportunity to turn their yard into a miniature version of "It's a Small World."

Most of my neighbors have complied with my unspoken wishes that they stick to low-key decorations. So far I see only lights, with an occasional smattering of "Santa stop here" signs, which is ok if you've got little kids in the house. In my role as Christmas Decoration Police, I do let some things slide. But some things do not get tolerated. Just in case you are thinking about decorating this week and want some guidlines, I offer you my list of

Some of these things may be fine if you live out in the woods somewhere, but when you live in a town with 40 houses to a block, you may want to have a little consideration. Don't use up all the power source in the neighborhood. Don't blind your neighbors with your lights. Don't make your decorations so ghastly that people come from miles around to see them and your little side street becomes a nightly traffic jam. I have a wire cutter. I will not hesitate to use it.

Posted by on November 24, 2001 05:36 AM |

Comments

This list is so classic! I love it....Every cruise by parts of Nassau county? You gotta know what I am talking about ;)

Posted by: felicia | November 24, 2001 07:52 AM

I am in Nassau County. It's the heartland of tacky decorations. Levittown seems to be the absolute pit of hell when it comes to Christmas.

Posted by: michele | November 24, 2001 08:00 AM

My mom has a light up nativity scene. I wish I could convince her of how tacky it is.....it's been the horror of my life since I was fifteen or so.

Posted by: Pfish | November 24, 2001 09:51 AM

Michele did you see Tamity’s horrifying Xmas ornament [Santa surfing]? She is afraid of it, but her mom bought it for her so she’s stuck with it.

Posted by: Davezilla | November 24, 2001 11:01 AM

now, hold up a minute--i must disagree. it is certainly NOT acceptable to do the tacky yard stuff even if you live out in the woods. as one living in the wilderness currently, i'm sad to report that both of my closest neighbors have fallen into the "disguising the junk in your yard as decorations" category. placing santa's sleigh atop a pile of rotting tires is just sick and wrong.

Posted by: brandy | November 24, 2001 10:59 PM

Brandy, you have my permission to go out there and set fire to that pile of tires.

Posted by: michele | November 25, 2001 05:35 AM

Did anyone else find the Santa on the Harley disturbing?

I thought so.

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