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Mutant

Beware the gaze

Converstation of the day:

scene: Person visiting in my office. We are making small talk while he waits for a file.

Person: You have a very disconcerting habit.

Me: What's that?

Person: You don't look people in the eye when you are having a conversation with them.

Me: Eh, it's that whole "Gaze of Death" thing.

Person: hmmm?

Me: Yea. If I look at someone too long they burst into flames. Just a small, weird power I was born with.

Person: You're a....mutant?

Me: Mmhmm.

Person: So....how's Professor X?

Me: Doing good.

Person: Ok, send him my regards.

Me: Will do.

And once again, I evade a discussion about how I don't look at people when I talk to them.

Posted by on October 23, 2001 02:09 PM |

Comments

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Posted by: Chris | October 23, 2001 04:04 PM

I mean this in the nicest possible way, Michele, but I fear you more & more each day.

No, seriously. I am pretty good about eye contact, actually most of the time I have to use restraint, because the line between good eye contact & the piercing stare of a psychopath is thin, indeed. However when my boss, who is the fat ugly old married gross bane of my existence, walks around my desk to make sure he's right in full face view to talk to me, I never make eye contact. In that case, it's a matter somewhere between discomfort & contempt - he creeps me out. Most people creep me out but I'm able to deal with it, but some, I just can't do it.

People can be creepy. When I meet people, I immediately assume they're going to be creepy & mean, till they prove otherwise. I've had nothing but bad experiences being open & trusting. Except on the internet but anyway I'll shut up now...

Posted by: kd | October 23, 2001 04:47 PM

yes my hubby has the exact same habit and it drives me crazy!!!

Even customers at his work complain to the bigger boss about it so i know its just not me.In this day and age,looking someone in the eye when youre having a convo just shows them that youre listening and i like to see that the person im talking to is listening to me.But your you and im me and i guess thats the way it will be.........

Posted by: Nicole | October 23, 2001 04:56 PM

Ah, the classic sign of low self esteem or painful shyness. I wouldn't have really guessed either were true of you, M...

Posted by: Candi | October 23, 2001 09:15 PM

you know ... i don't hold eye contact either, and i know it does not go unnoticed. i also know it's perceived as a negative. makes people uncomfortable.

however --

with me, i know that shyness is part of it, but it's primarily down to the fact that i'm a bit hard of hearing. so i watch lips, not eyes.

Posted by: elise | October 24, 2001 08:05 AM

I do make eye contact with people I know well. When it's a newly met person, or someone I don't know that well, I have a problem with it. Unless they've pissed me off and then I have no problem staring them down until they melt. Or combust.

Posted by: michele | October 24, 2001 09:28 AM

Similarly, I believe in the "Gaze of Death" thing too. Except, I use that as an excuse to look directly at someone I'm talking to. I look at people hoping they'll burst into flames. It hasn't happened yet, but I soll hold out hope that my mutant powers haven't developed yet, or I get bit by a radioactive basilisk.

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